Things I Wish I Had Been Mentally Prepared For Before Having a Baby

So, I've been thinking with quite some amusement lately about the things that I wish someone had told me before I gave birth and became a parent to a newborn. I thought I'd share them for the amusement of other moms, for those who are about to become moms, or those who look forward to being moms in the future. Lots of moms. I also keep thinking about all the things I THINK I wish I had known, but then I realize that if I had known some of this stuff, I might have been too scared to go through with it. So I won't list those things. Anyway. Without further ado, here is what I wish I had known (in no particular order because I'm too lazy to really give much thought to the order).

1. I wish I had known that I would have to nurse, burp, and change my baby (sometimes change him twice or even three times) in a befuddled, somnambulistic state every single morning before I had my coffee. (Except when grandparents were here. Praise GOD for grandparents.)

2. And before breakfast. In fact, forget food altogether for a while.

3. I REALLY wish I'd known that moms never actually get any breaks or vacations. Even if I am away from my baby, I can't stop myself from thinking about him, and wondering if he's ok, and hoping he's not being too much of a burden on whoever is watching him. And I feel either so tired or mentally drained (or both) all the time, that even recreational or relaxing things feel like work.

4. I wish I had known that I would NOT, in fact, get a good, full night's sleep right after giving birth. You'd think I would deserve that after being awake for 40+ hours, and practically pushing a watermelon out of my body. But no. If you're lucky, the nurse will take the baby for a couple hours, and tell you to "have a good nap." I think I cried.

5. I wish I'd known that I might also be too exhausted to take a shower right after giving birth. Which is nasty, because there are copious amounts of sweat involved. Make that blood, sweat, and tears.

6. I wish I had known that life, at least for the first two months or so, would be like one of those nightmares I get sometimes where I am really, really late for work or for something really important, but in the dream I keep stopping to tie my shoe, or talk to someone, or do some other random thing that just keeps me from getting to work/appointment/big important thing at all, let alone on time.

7. I wish I had known that my temper, which I thought had pretty much faded into the past, would rear its ugly head over and over again as I battle physical exhaustion, sleep deprivation, spit up, and screaming/crying/fussing for hours at a time.

8. I now know why it's so hard to stay fit and healthy as a mother. I had this delusion that I'd keep working out and eat healthy and all that good stuff even after I became a mom. I thought I could be different and do it. I wish I'd realized that, as it turns out, the healthy stuff all takes work to prepare. Plus I usually have to choose between whether to take a nap myself, eat, use the bathroom, or do laundry/clean up, let alone work out or prepare a nutritious meal.

9. I wish I'd known that I WOULD have to make these kinds of choices while my baby sleeps.

10. People told me this one, but I wish I had truly known it for myself before I had him - that he will grow SO fast, SO quickly, and even those first 8 weeks of torture hardship are still weeks filled with awe of how beautiful this tiny little person is, filled with the most incredible love I have ever felt for such a little one, filled with laughter and delight over every new little thing he does, and filled with lots of growth and learning on my end.

Being a mom is definitely the most exhausting, heart-wrenching, painful thing I have ever been through, but it is also, truly, the most worth it.